Forgiveness - Matthew 18:21-25

In his book, What's So Amazing About Grace , Phillip Yancey tells the story of Ernest Hemingway. Hemingway grew up in a very devout evangelical family, and yet there he never experienced the grace of Christ.

He lived a libertine life that most of us would call "dissolute", but there was no father, no parent waiting for him and he sank into the mire of a graceless depression.

A short story he wrote perhaps reveals the grace that he hoped for. It is the story of a Spanish father who decided to reconcile with his son who had run away to Madrid.

The father, in a moment of remorse, takes out this ad in El Libro , a newspaper. "Paco, meet me at Hotel Montana, Noon, Tuesday, All is forgiven, Papa."

When the father arrived at the square in hopes of meeting his son, he found eight hundred Pacoes waiting to be reunited with their father.

Was Paco such a popular name? Or is a father's forgiveness the salve for every soul?[1]

Historically, man has had great difficulty in forgiving others, yet we long desperately for forgiveness for ourselves.  This quarter our lessons are about identifying marks of Christians.  Today, our lesson topic is forgiveness.  In other words...

Big Idea: A forgiving spirit is a nonnegotiable part of the Christian’s character.

Now, I think we all believe this to be true.  However, I think some Christians struggle to live by this value.  It is easy to say that we should be forgiving towards those who hurt us in the safety of the worship center.  But it is a little different when our neighbor wrongs us Monday morning.

How much should we forgive those who harm us?  Why should we be so forgiving?  Jesus answers these questions in our text in a dialogue He has with Peter on forgiveness and a parable Jesus tells about an unforgiving servant.

Why should the Christian be characterized by a forgiving spirit?

1. We recognize the fallacy of forgiveness limits, vv. 21-22.

Discussion: Why do you think Peter wanted to forgive a person only seven times?

Discussion: Why are we more forgiving toward some people and less forgiving toward others?

Discussion: What are the problems with setting limits on how far we will forgive others?

(God wants us to love others unconditionally.  We may want to forgive some more times than our limit prescribes.  We may want not to forgive others as much.  Our love then becomes very conditional and even hypocritical.)

2. We recognize the miniscule proportions of the perpetrated wrong, vv. 23-31.

The NIV Study Bible says one talent was worth twenty years' worth of wages for a laborer.  Twenty times ten thousand equals a debt in the amount worth two hundred thousand years' worth of labor that the first servant owed.

In contrast, the second servant owed one denarii, which was worth one day's labor.  The first servant owed an amount so tremendous it is hard to even fathom.  He was forgiven all of it by a merciful master.  Yet he ruthlessly demanded an amount trivial in comparison from one of his own servants.

Discussion: Why do you think the servant was in such a rush to get what was owed him?

Discussion: Do Christians sometimes also - after receiving God’s great grace - immediately accost others without mercy?  Why would someone do that?

3. We recognize the gigantic debt we owe God, vv. 32-35.

Discussion: Why did God have mercy on us?

Discussion: What do we owe God?

Many years ago lived two twin brothers who were inseparable.  They went to the same schools while growing up, wore the same kind of clothes, and were involved in the same kinds of activities.  When they became men, they took over the family business - a store - and worked so harmoniously together that they became the envy of the community.

One day, a customer bought an item for a dollar.  The brother who was at the register placed it on top of the register.  Then he walked to the front of the store to say good-bye to the customer.  When he came back, the dollar was gone.  He asked his brother about it.  His brother said he had never seen it.  His brother could clearly remember putting the bill on top of the register.

Everything would have been fine if the issue had been dropped then and there.  But an hour later, he questioned his brother again, with noticeable suspicion in his voice.  The brother answered him back angrily.

This was the beginning of a serious breach of trust between the two.  They could not settle the disagreement and decided to dissolve their partnership.  They built a wall separating the two stores.  What was a thriving business became two struggling, competitive stores.  Each brother tried their best to gain allies against each other.  This warfare went on almost twenty years.

Then one day a car from out of state pulled up to the stores.  The stranger went into one of the sides and asked how long he had been in business there.  Learning he had been there over twenty years, the man said, “You’re the one with whom I must settle an old score.”

He told a story about himself twenty years back.  He had been a drifter, moving from town to town, with no money and almost nothing to eat.

He was walking down the alley behind the store when he spotted the dollar bill on the register.  He had been raised in a Christian home and knew it was wrong to steal.  Yet he was so hungry that he gave into temptation.  Now he had returned because he knew he would never be at peace without making restitution.

The storekeeper, now an old, old man, began weeping uncontrollably.  Finally getting a hold of himself, he asked the stranger to go to the other side and tell the man the same story.  Soon there were two aged men weeping uncontrollably.[2]

Such is just one example of the tragedy of unforgiveness.  We have been forgiven much by God.  Therefore, our life perspective should change when we remember God’s grace.

In a moment we will close in prayer.  As I pray I wonder if you have some faults or sins you are holding against another.  If so, I would urge you to seek God’s forgiveness for holding that grudge and determine to forgive the person yourself.

Prayer: